So, it’s officially been a week since Wuffer and I broke up. It still hurts, not knowing if I’m innocent or guilty of what I did. But helping a friend who’s also struggling (with eerily similar reasons) is far more important than feeling sorry for myself.
But doing so, sadly made another friend not so happy with me and the friend (not for a failure to not listen to his advice.. but feeling his advice fell on deaf ears).
Let’s get started;
Scooby’s struggles are just like mine
Yesterday was pretty uneventful, apart with playing with my new iPhone. Installed Pandora and Discord on it (now I can contact people while on the bathroom, while listening to my music). I also bought a few accessories for the new phone: that ‘military-grade’ phone case, and a longer phone charger (so I can place the phone on my computer desk while it’s charging). They’re scheduled to arrive next Tuesday (the 9th).
Around 3 in the afternoon, things started to heat up. DJ sends me a DM, asking me why Scooby doesn’t like him for having the mini-BlueDrago on his avatar. Even through he already knew the main reason, he didn’t understand why Scooby doesn’t block the avatar.
I agreed with him, and said I would talk to Scooby if I could. But the fact he(Scooby) hasn’t spoken to me since Wuffer and I broke up.. I knew I would have to get Kovo involved in this (as much as I didn’t want to, given his adverse thoughts for Scooby before). Don’t have a choice, though. If I can’t talk to Scooby, Kovo’s going to have to.
Found out a bit later (from DJ), Kovo had already talked to Scooby about this (when DJ was there), and tried to stop him. That means.. I have to be the one to talk sense into him. Very well. He’s a friend, and I know how to handle it.
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11pm at night, logged in and Kovo told me everything, saying Scooby likely won’t talk to him and wished me luck. So I went to the world Scooby was in.. and saw him talking to Wuffer of all people. Uhh.. why is he talking to my ex-boyfriend? Half of me felt Wuffer was possibly trying to help Scooby, and the other told me.. well ..turning him against
me (stupid, I know).
Either way. I had to get out of there and went back to Kovo. Unfortunately, he’s dealing with another (unrelated) issue that popped up while I was gone. Apparently, someone has managed to leak the Sunken Boi model (and they’re trying to find out whom). The info about it has been posted on Kovo’s Discord, with an extensive list of names that are confirmed to be given permission to use the model. If we see anyone with the model that’s not on the list, we are to take a picture of them (in Desktop mode to show their
nameplate), and send the picture to Kovo for verification.
Time past, and I thought of going back to Scooby and trying to talk to him again. Got there, and found Kovo talking to him (with Wuffer there). I let them talk by themselves while staying far, far away from Wuffer. Jusper came up and asked me how I was
doing, and I pretty much told him everything. He then asked “wasn’t Sneaky once Wuffer’s boyfriend?” and I said yeah, telling him what Sneaky told me. And he said he was on Sneaky’s side.
So, that’s double the proof Sneaky might had been right about Wuffer. But I still wasn’t convinced what happened had any relation to what Sneaky went through.
Scooby came up to me about this time, and asked “can we talk?” Said sure and followed him to an area of the room. I was almost sure it was related to what Wuffer had told
him, as it seemed Kovo (to me) had the whole issue with Scooby and DJ under control.
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…Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case. He felt Kovo, even though he had the right
idea, couldn’t understand what was really going on. Honestly, Scoob.. you’re not wrong. Kovo, though he’s trying his best to maintain the peace, sadly just doesn’t understand the struggle. I hate saying that behind his back, but it’s true.
As for DJ, I told Scooby to block him completely. When he questioned, I said “do you dislike DJ’s avatar, or do you dislike DJ for what he said to you?” Now, I kind of wish I could take back those words and Scooby would just block the avatar. I don’t really know the entire story, but the basis of what I said is how I handled it in the past (with Lunar and Blueberry.. and Wuffer). But I also told him to unblock DJ when you feel you’ve moved on.
Then the conversation went to me and Wuffer. Upon key things, Scooby starts freaking out saying “dude, this is JUST like Blue and I!! What the HELL??”
When I told him “I just want to talk to Wuffer, like adults.”, he said he’ll do it. Told him he didn’t have to, but he said “you helped me with Blue, I have to pay back the favor”. In other words, this was his way to apologize for making me feel I wasted my time staying with him an hour past my bedtime to be with him.
He then ran off to talk to Wuffer on the other side of the room.
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Wuffer speaks to me
At this time, I had to replace the batteries in my controllers. Got that done after finding the charger. An hour passed as I was talking to a few friends. One of them pointed behind
me, saying “Benie, they’ve moved”. Watched the two closely, then saw Wuffer walking up to me. Oh shit, here we go. Let out a heavy sigh, saying to myself “alright Ben, you wanted him to talk to you, here you go. Get it done.”
First opened up by saying “I’m so sorry for what I said to you”. He said “I know, that’s why I forgive you”. ..W. w w what? You.. forgive me, after what I’ve done? T..thank you. That means so much. Told him how rough of a week I had, and he said the same. Said he couldn’t stop thinking about me. I.. I could only feel the pain I went through, and the tears I cried. But, this PROVES, what Sneaky said about Wuffer, didn’t happen to me. I KNEW it! I KNEW it was unrelated!!
When telling him how I blocked him because I felt he never wanted to see me again, but he said “did I say this to you?” I looked down and said “no..”, he said “you should’ve known I needed a few days. I never meant to unfriend you either.” I feel like an ass
now, but.. having never dealt with a heartbreak like this before, I didn’t, know, how to handle it. That’s the honest to god truth. But, I now know not to assume when it comes to this.
–
As for the paragraph I sent to him when I felt I was losing control of the relationship, he said “I did read it all”. Asked “then why did it come to a shock to you when I told you later?” He said it was because I never explained to him what I meant.. FUCK me!! I need to fucking STOP ASSUMING when it comes to things like this!! And again, I told him how sorry I was for not doing so.
I can’t fucking believe I left that out when I made my paragraph!! But, it’s all good now. He forgave me, we’re friends again, and I can freely move on now! I’ve learned things from this, that I don’t have to feel guilt anymore for doing them. But, I must use what I learned to prevent this from ever happening again.
He also confirmed what Moon told me that he is indeed dating someone else, but says how it isn’t working out. He really, truly had feelings for me, that he can’t get from anyone else.
So I offered what he offered me, and he said “it’s a big ‘if'”. But, who knows. As long as I learn from this.. *shrug*
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Kovo Is Mad
And at the end of all of this, it wasn’t sunshine for Kovo, who feels I just fucked him
over (yet claims it’s not my fault). The reason is him telling Scooby to block DJ’s
avatar, then I come along and tell Scooby to block DJ completely, and to “get him out of your life”. Now Kovo says he doesn’t like Scooby for not listening to him. He feels there’s going to be more drama after this.
Look, I completely understand him. He feels his suggestion is ignored, and is only going to cause even more drama (like before). He’s sick of always cleaning up after Scooby, and I get it. I need to do something, so Kovo would feel appreciated.. but I don’t know what.
Yet at the same… ugh, god damnit. If only Kovo would understand Scooby and I, THEN he would get it! But it’s us, feeling like we have to understand his perspective.
I.. I can fix this;
1. Take over for Kovo, when it comes to Scooby.
2. Stop coming to him with my issues (or issues with others).. especially if they’re related to Scooby in any way.
I have to take the stress off him. What I saw last night, was a broken man who wished he didn’t have to be there for everyone. He’s my friend, and I have to do something. I can’t just let him suffer, that’s not right.
EDIT: After Kovo called Scooby an ‘asshole’ in a DM, this is going a bit too far. So I told Scooby to reverse what I said and just block DJ’s avatar. That way, all three parties will be happy. Yet Kovo is still pissed at Scooby… for WHY?! Be pissed at ME, dude.. not him!
Anyway, we’re going to be discussing this tonight. Going to get on earlier than expected to do this.
EDIT2: Nevermind intervening, because I think Wuffer may had convinced Scooby to deal with the problem himself instead of getting Kovo and myself involved. The two are becoming good friends, so it’s possible. I just hope he can settle his differences with
DJ, and we won’t have to hear about this ever again.
He also told me he broke up with Plasmic, knowing that Kovo was right about the person being underaged. The good thing about it, the person actually agrees it feels wrong (unlike Lunar, who’s still dating anyone she can…)
