What a busy month it’s been, and it’s almost over. Soon December will be here. It was busy in VRChat again.. well, busy’ish. Trying to be with Novice and watching videos, him having constant issues with his display drivers crashing.
We felt it might be the world he’s in when we went to Furry Village and he never crashed until much later that night (but only once). Yet before he did, how cute it was of him falling asleep while laying down on me (multiple times).
Awwww.. 🥰
Anyway, I’ll get back to this cutie pie in a moment. I need to talk about something a bit more pressing.
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Trying to help my son
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The ferret in the above picture is my son, Shoot. I do care about him, but not as much as I really should be. I’m not even sure if I should blame myself for that, as he came up to me and was all “can you be my dad?!”
He’s quite clingy, and my friends question me when they hear his super deep voice. But that’s not the main problem here. He’s unable to make friends and gets quite sad from
it, feeling he isn’t ‘fitting in’. I feel for him and have been trying what I can to give him confidence to make friends, but it seems my attempts are one fail after another.
When I said before “I’m no father figure”.. I wasn’t kidding. He’s better off finding someone else to be his father. Seriously. I cannot DO this. I don’t have the patience to be a father (as I did before with Fluffy).
Back then though, I had no excuse not to be a father. Jero left me, Fluffy was all I had and I wanted to give him a really good virtual life. I’m trying to make it up to Shoot by one of these days having a similar ‘father-son bonding day’ I had with Fluffy; drawing things and watching videos together. I pray it’ll work the same (if not better). Probably do it sometime next month.
Honestly though, he needs professional help. Even with the advice I give him, something is keeping him from really opening up. Says he has ADHD. I feel I need Nova to talk to him as a RP mother (something he lost when Garruk disappeared), to hopefully help him get started on the right foot. I wish I didn’t have to get Nova involved (because I don’t want to put the burden on her) but I seriously need help to help him. …I cannot do this on my own.
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Feeling confident to say those 3 words
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Going back to Novice, there’s not much to say that I haven’t already said about him, of how sweet and charming he is. The fact he fell asleep on me was.. my heart just can’t take how adorable that is. It’s like Jero, but better. As if this is Jero undoing what he did to me by doing all of this (but as another person who says “Yee” a lot when he’s happy).
Hearing him getting choked up when I say really sweet things, is so cute. 🙂 So with bedtime almost here, I pulled him into Kovo’s house and said “you know when you revealed how you feel the same about me the same as I do for you? And how you said you can’t really say the ‘l’ word unless you can mean it? …Well, I feel confident enough to say those three powerful words, to you. 😉”
Hearing Novice getting all flustered and being unable to speak, was so cute. Hehe. Telling him how sweet and down to earth he is, only made him choke up more. And there is when I felt proud to mark a very strong bond with him. “I love you, Novice”.
Rubbing his head while he snuggled with me, he told me that I was making him aroused. I kept talking sweet to him, and saying once again “I love you, Novice” (hoping he would open up and say the same).
He finally did later on, marking a strong bond between us; “I love you Benie” he
said, sounding proud to say it. I told him “I will always love you”. He said “I worry about myself”. Told him I understood what he meant, then answered with “even with your busy work life, I will keep loving you.” And he was very happy to hear that, saying once again that I made him aroused of him sleeping on my chest.
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There is a reason for me saying that, how I feel confident he won’t do what Jero did to me. I feel confident he’ll be communicative with me, and I’ll be willing to work with him when he’s not able to be there in VRChat. Does this mean we’re a thing? I say quite possibly yes. Given enough time, he might have me on his arm (and I might have him on mine).
We spent the rest of the morning in a private instance, just chilling.. him looking cute relaxing on my chest, saying he wants full body so badly;
So yeah, we’re unofficially dating (until I hear him call me his BF). Which might happen soon. The fact he said “I love you” to me is good enough though. 💕