(Actually, it’s been 1 month, 1 week and two days. But screw it)
On July 29th, I made a tough but firm decision to resign as a moderator on the MRT Server. Since my resigning, I became what is known as a ‘Trusted Member’. Of that month, I’ve been off and on the server, but on frequently since July 31st.
Do I miss being a Moderator? At times. I mainly miss having WorldEdit and that compass. But what I definitely do not miss, is walking away grinning from ear to ear while the other staffers get bombarded with WorldEdit requests.
Also, I can finally do things I want without getting called for a WorldEdit, or having to deal with unruly people on the server. I can also leave the server as long as I want to (or whenever I want to, without having to say “I’ll be back, guys.”), without feeling ‘binded’ to it. I won’t get demoted from Trusted, of not coming on the server for months.
Now I know Frumple has been trying to ram into my thick skull, that I am NOT ‘bound’ to the server and I can take off as much as I want/need. It just never sank into my head. When I was gone for 3/4 months and had no desire to come back to Minecraft, I was surprised the Admins weren’t trying to get me back on the server for being gone so long.
And the best thing about not being a mod? No more of those stupid Staff Meetings! No more having to be on at a certain time! No more stress of trying to be perfect and professional! 😀
I’m not saying that being a Trusted is easy. It’s easier than being a Mod, for sure. But being a Trusted is riskier, when it comes to watching what you say and do (the rules apply to you a lot harsher, than being a Mod). I can’t just “I can do that, I’m a mod”(shouldn’t be saying that anyway).
Having to depend on a mod to help me, feels degrading at times. This is why I do my best to limit asking for help unless I really need it, or if a mod that I know who is really nice (like MinecraftYoshi26) is on.
I do really wish there was a [Retired Mod] rank that would give you limited WorldEdit powers. But thinking practical, only I would use said title as I’m currently the only Former Mod that’s active on the server.
Do I feel I made a bad decision of quitting? No. I should had done so, months ago. With how much stress I was putting on Frumple and the Admins of trying to be perfect, and the whole road debate, and screwing up left and right by saying the wrong things, and/or doing the wrong things.
Unfortunately, this still happens even with me being Trusted. I still at times don’t know when to shut up, or say the wrong things (even though some of them are actually true).
For example, people were asking about one of the recent banned members. I said “This person was just a whiny brat that couldn’t get what he wanted”. A mod got on me and said to respect banned players. Though he adds “even though that’s true”.
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Another time, someone was saying “wow, my internet sucks!”. I have had it up to here by people blaming ‘their internet’ and told him off constantly, trying to ram it into his skull that it was his connection or ISP that is bad, and he doesn’t own the internet. Frumple got on me and told me to let it go.
Will I ever return to being a mod again? Some people wonder why I resigned, saying I always had what it took to be a mod. I mostly just want my old powers back, without the WorldEdit requesters. Since that will never happen, I’m contended enough to stay Trusted.
I do hope, far in the future (if I live that long), I’ll feel like doing it again. But I got people like CG who ask me “how do you enjoy your retirement?”. I feel old when I see the word “retire” as what I’ve done. I’ve resigned, not retired. Retiring means I have no desire to ever do whatever, ever again for the rest of my life.
I wouldn’t be on the server anymore (or on the MRT Skype Chat), if I truly retired.
I also at times, wish I still never joined the server. I think I possibly would had been better off if I never joined. The fact I’m still screwing up and saying slightly immature things, or things that have no real meaning (to them), are reasons why.