Merry Wurmxmas!! (wait, I said that already)
Both logged in. First thing we did was run up to Santa and “You’ve been a good boy, here’s your gift!”
So we have our gifts. Why I wasn’t all “WOOT GIFTS MUST OPEN NOW!!” was angry spoiling it for me. He told me it’s Fireworks this year.
At first I thought “Pfft. This year’s gift isn’t fireworks!! …Is it?” but he went on and on about what you can do with them, and having to use the unstable client to see them.
After that, I saw that the guy delivered. I paid the 1s and 10c, but didn’t get it out of the mail. I half thought it’ll be there when we get home. So we run to the boat and I see Konlin leaving too. He follows us all the way back ’till I hit the Bay Hill Canal.
As we’re nearing the house, I see new development North of my settlement. A guy named “Blarghargh” is busy chopping down trees and digging. When I talked to him he said that they just saw the place and thought no one lived near here. Wasn’t he surprised when he found out I do.
In my house we open up our gifts, with my alt going first. And sure enough, the gift is “birchwood fireworks”.
Immediately I begin to cuss like a sailor knowing what angry said was true (in Village chat mind you).
My alt went to the pier to try them out, and notice they wouldn’t work without a flint and steel being equipped. My alt was right when he said “maybe they need some kind of spark”.
We’re still on the regular client here, and they do nothing. So we both get the unstable client, and OHH GOD the studdering! But my alt launched one and all I saw was a firework come out and explode into a circle. All it does. SOOO WORTH coming down there!!
Angry on the other hand acted like I don’t know what I was pissed about. He claims it’s awesome. I say he’s lying through his teeth and won’t admit I’m right that this “gift” is worthless!
For the people that say I’m spoiled, take a look at this list of gifts Santa gave since 2005 to now. The Fireworks are the only non-helpful gift in that time frame. All the others are helpful.
EDIT: One year later as I look at this post, maybe I am spoiled. That I should appreciate even getting a gift. Even though it did nothing but shoot out one firework, it’s the thought that counts.
What I was pissed about is coming all the way down there, having to deal with those zombies, and this is what I get in return. Well, since I’m no longer in Wurm (not over this), it won’t be a problem this year.
.
So, I’m thinking the ‘present’ I bought from FM (the large maul) will replace the fireworks. Went to my mailbox, opened it up… nothing inside it.
Turns out you can only pick it up at the mailbox that you paid for the item. The GM’s are all “LOL I’m not doing it for you!”, forcing me to have to go BACK to FM.
But I also wondered if I could put this fail gift in my coffin. My alt proved that I could, so I tried unwrapping my gift. Suddenly music starts to play. I stand there shocked where this music is coming from, and… why the devs did this.
After the music stops I stare at my alt, still shocked. Then it hits me. THIS is why they wanted you to use the unstable client!
Getting that out of my system I put the gift in the coffin and we head back to FM, this time on my Corbita. I’m taking my alt again so we can snack on that buffet table again, to keep our Nutrition to 99%.
The trip is of course quicker, taking just an hour to get down there. I park my Corbita at the Avalon dock, knowing all I have to do is grab the maul and go home.
So we get up there, I check the mailbox… no maul. I ask the GM and they say, “Sorry. Someone stole it. There’s nothing we can do.”. I felt like yelling the loudest yell I’ve ever yelled in my life which would be felt and heard server-wide.
Anyone can take the item. Even as I type this I find it hard to believe how incompetent the devs are. You would think that the bank would work just like a container, and having a FUCKING STEAL-PROOF SYSTEM!!!!!!!!!!!
I didn’t know what to do after that, but I felt who has been slowing me down this week, has finally won. And now he can claim his fucking prize. Just before I brutally attack him so hard he’ll have to talk out of his ass…
I knew there was only four options. So I tried the first by asking again in Local. A person said to ask in Impalong. I thought for sure by doing that I’ll get a replacement maul for the one I lost.
So we sail to the Impalong, I ask nicely. At first it seemed like “Why would I make one for a newbie?”. Since I hate being called a noob in Wurm I told them I’ve been playing since 2008. Then it started to get ugly and I knew my chances of getting one made were falling.
And I was right. They pretty much put their foot down and told me to go make my own. That if I played that long I shouldn’t be a lazy ass.
So we go back to FM again. At this time I was about to say “fuck this game I quit”. It’s fucking CHRISTMAS, Impalong! Apparently they suddenly lost their spirit.
My alt tried to suggest we just go check every merchant on the server, but I knew I probably wouldn’t find one that does. So I went to kchat and asked them a simple question…
“Are large mauls that hard to make that no one on this server is selling them via their merchants”. One said that one was selling a large maul at FM about four days ago. Again I’m thinking “why me Why Me WHY ME?!?!?”, then I get a PM saying they can mail a maul to me. 30ql with some CoC cast on it.
Desperate enough for anything I take the offer.
So I head back to the Impalong and wait out the hour the person told me it would take. Finally it comes and this time I make sure I get my hands on it. With it in my possession I felt like holding it up above my head and having a beam of light come down over me, and screaming “VICTORY!!”.
The reason I came to Impalong is due to the low ql. The impers told me to make my own and they’ll imp it, so… I didn’t make my own, but I HAVE my own. And they’re now imping it as I speak. But with tomorrow being Christmas Day, the chances of them still working on it are minimal.
Spending time with their families is much more important than Impalong anyway (and yes I’m lying through my teeth… but that’s just me. When I want something, I want it NOW).
The moral of this story is to never.. NEVER pay for something that has been mailed to you in Freedom Market.