A pretty busy that has made me so tired, to where I feel all I want to do is sleep my life away. Been unable to sleep for the past two mornings, keep waking up at 9:30 in the morning for no reason and have trouble falling back asleep. It’s like my internal clock is out of whack of when to wake me up.
\nLots to talk about, one that happened the day before yesterday.<\/p>\n
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\nAm I trying too hard?
\nCategories:<\/strong><\/em> ‘Personal’, ‘Love Drama’
\nThe day before yesterday, my mind and body was filled with anxiety. Anxiety, of feeling my own words are going to make Jero not interested in me.
\nThis was fueled by him grabbing the avatar I did for him, yet not really wanting to come on for me to see he got it working, so I could delete the temp upload. I kept thinking by saying to him “I will do anything for you” is starting to turn him off.. that I’m not being myself. Yet in my head, I feel I constantly have to impress him. I do not know why I’m like
\nthis.. oh wait, I do: anxiety he’s going to leave me.
\nTry to tell myself “he loves you and isn’t going to leave you, calm the fuck down!” And it seemed my own words finally got to me. There’s a reason why he didn’t come on, so ask him nicely the next day.
\nDid get my answer, but all it did was cause more anxiety. However, it’s a different kind. I’ll be discussing it later in this blog post.<\/p>\n
\nThe Dutchie Meetup
\nCategories:<\/strong><\/em> ‘Personal’, ‘Drama’
\nCredit goes to ‘DutchPrimagen’ for the video! It’s around 4:12 when I start talking after finishing dinner.<\/em>
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