Before I get to today’s facepalm-filled post (“I THOUGHT you said there would be NO MORE dragon-related posts!!”), I wanted to announce an update to my deed redesign.
\nAnd that update is I’m nearly done building my new house. Almost all the day yesterday, I’ve been sawing planks, making nails, and other things.
\nUnfortunately I cannot have a staircase… yet, as carts cannot use them; only Openings will work. Thankfully it’s not the end of the world. All I need to do is make sure I have everything I need Loaded\/Unloaded on the second floor that I need done, then I can simply destroy the Opening and build the Staircase. Another good thing is that the Opening doesn’t require as many materials as the Staircase does.<\/p>\n
I’m also waiting for the crops (corn) I planted for B2 to grow, so he can practice his HFC skill. A few days ago, he made his first Meal. Sadly they aren’t really filling right now (about 21QL), which is why he needs to work on his skill to make them better for us.
\nThe reason I need them to grow, is so they can be removed for the rest of the plan to work. Everything relys on them now.<\/p>\n
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\nAnd now, to go back to.. yes, more of this crap you guys thought I was done with. \ud83d\ude1b
\nHonestly, I’m -mostly- over this. But the week after her passing, there’s still two thoughts I literally can’t bury with her.
\nThe first thing is the betrayal, of course. She did tell me to forgive them, but how can I? How can I forgive\/forget betrayal? How can I forgive\/forget seeing NO remorse from them? How can I forgive\/forget not even giving me another option?!
\nThat “I feel like I wish I could’ve done more” feeling also plays with this. I guess I keep being reminded of the other two dragons which are likely being captive somewhere, and wish I could’ve been one of them. Yet I can wish until I was blue in the face, and it’ll never bring her back.<\/p>\n
But the second thing is even stronger than this: “Will this happen again?” Yes, she’s gone, and I can’t bring her back. I get that. But I don’t want this happening again to me. I don’t even want to know there’s another one around. I won’t be completely removing access, though, as the former owners of my deed made a secondary access route via the side gate. It also leads to all points East of the deed and eventually connects to highways (which are public). I just want to make it hard for anyone (even myself) to go up there and witness what happened. . Going back to leaving the Alliance, Garit reminded me that anyone of them would’ve probably done the same thing to me. Yes, that’s definitely true. But at least I wouldn’t be staring at the names of her uncompassionate killers. Before I get to today’s facepalm-filled post (“I THOUGHT you said there would be NO MORE dragon-related posts!!”), I wanted to announce an update to my deed redesign. And that update is I’m nearly done building my new house. Almost … Continue reading
\nAnd the simplest way to prevent this, is to do something that’s against the rules; removing access to the abandoned deed by removing the road connecting to mine– literally banning myself (and others) from going up there. It clearly states it’s against the rules to alter public roads unless you made them.
\nYet I have an ace up my sleeve, for that road isn’t<\/em> classified as a ‘highway’. Plus no one travels on it, because no one comes here. There’s a reason most of the deeds around me are abandoned husks of their former selves.
\nPlus, if the GMs see me and try to ban me from the game? Bring it on. I won’t care anymore. That will be the ultimate “fuck you” to Wurm from me.<\/p>\n
\nSo if a dragon shows up, up there, I won’t know. I won’t care either. I just don’t want to see that road. I got to ‘burn’ it out of my mind. And the only way is to remove it.<\/p>\n
\nOne last thing I’ve been debating of doing, is leaving the Alliance. I added Garit as a friend, in hopes he would understand what I’m going through (and to talk to him if I need to). Sadly he, like everyone on this server, does not. All they see it is “good job guys!”, and I’m standing there holding onto her body, trying not to break down in tears infront of everyone. There’s a reason I never said “thanks for coming” on that day. Yeah.. thanks for killing what I tried to protect from you fuckers!!<\/p>\n
\nYet even before all of this mess, I still debated on leaving. Felt like I didn’t fit in and stuff. I’m just curious what are the downsides of not being in an Alliance (obviously besides not having anyone to talk to). And if I ever need Marble again, I’ll just order some and go pick it up.
\nThere’s really no point in staying. As long as Wurm still has a community who is willing to help, that’s really all I need. The only time I needed to be a part of the Alliance was in the early days of trying to get back up on my two feet and getting my deed back.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"